Saturday, August 9, 2008

Remembering Why

I start school on September 2.

Nine units.
Sometimes I think I must be crazy.

How am I going to take nine units, continue to home school my daughter, maintain relationships with Duane, my kids, and friends.

How am I going to exercise and clean and cook?
How am I going to pursue writing and getting published when my time is spent studying?
How am I going to make time to spend with God?

I can't do everything!

I start thinking about all of this and I start to panic--and I haven't even started yet.

It is important for me to remember why I want to go to school and so I am going to write down the reasons:
  • I don't want to be a church secretary for the rest of my life.
    • I love working for the church. I do.
    • I have some administrative gifts, but this does not define me.
    • On days when my job is primarily administrative, I am completely drained.
    • I want to prepare myself to step into another role as God provides opportunities.
  • I see myself as a writer and a teacher. Everything I do comes from this perspective.
    • I ask myself how can we communicate this topic better?
    • My desire is to mentor, to teach, to change thought patterns.
    • I love teaching.
    • I love creating materials for others to use to teach.
    • I love writing down ideas that influence and teach.
    • Writing, developing curriculum, and teaching and encouraging others energizes me and makes me feel alive.
  • I want to meet new people--people with diverse ideas and philosophies.
When life gets hard this fall, when I want to quit, when I want to stay where I am because it really isn't that bad...

I need to remember why I am doing what I am doing.

I want to be who I was made to be.
I want to walk into the future God planned for me.
I want to continually redefine myself so that God use me to do things that are bigger than me.

Don't forget, Erin. Don't forget.